Carpet issues

Nikki just reminded me that i can not let an opportunity for a post about something very long and winded go by.

I have to tell you about the men.

I woke up one afternoon hearing a creak and a thump crunch. It was our screen door, and then our "solid" door caving beneath the weight of that puny fist. It was a man with a florescent orange slip of paper.
"Hello?"
"Do you have any allergies?"
I had just woken up, i had a cold. "Huh?" Sneeze.

"Asthma, something something, something something. etc"

Here's where i make yet another shining moment of error and say "Hayfever."

So anyway, they obviously had my address and henceforth phone number. They call the next day and said "Carpets or Sofa?" I didn't see why not. We have a rather large annoying rug next to the fireplace that someones always complaining of having to clean.

Later on i hear from the Parents the they same people have been around the last block we lived on here 10 years ago before. They're supposedly pushy and really want you to buy a vacuum cleaner.

"How can they 'make' you buy a vacuum cleaner?" I thought dumbly. Of course the time the next day that they were scheduled to arrive i left the house in the van. Sadly they turned up just as i got home. My escapes never work.

Henry was our Croatian descent somewhat serious 'friendly' assistant. Dad informed him that we weren't interested in the hunk of retro metal. Nor would we change our minds. The man was hardy and got to work at leisure. He was in for the long haul.

4.30

Man shows us brochures. Dad waves them off with disinterest in a very polite way.

5.30

Man has demonstrated that we live in a dust factory. It is toxic and it will make us sick. There were mounds and mounds of dust and dirt extracted from the carpet. "Is it shaving off the threads?" Someone asks. He's cleaned a quarter of it and has enough dirt gathered to fill a bucket. And cover our extra floor space. Man will rethink the houses he chooses to demonstrate at next time according to size.

(A small bucket)

We feel somewhat humiliated which i guess was part of the process. The 'getting on the bandwagon' speech was next. "Do you really want to live in all this dirt?"

6.30

We're starving. Man suddenly gets a spark of interest in showing us what he can do to one of our mattresses. Dad asks if we can skip the mattress demonstration. But no, he was fixated. He's got to show us what lives beneath. Dust mites he says, create a whole lot of dust. Germs, Bacteria, not to mention skin cells are what he scares us with next. We should all be dead by now.

Whos mattress can i violate? Is what he was thinking when he asked for a volunteer bed to work with. He took the vacuum cleaner and showed us much more mounds of dust.

7.30

He finally got around to the other three quarters of the carpet. He shampoos it afterwards. It looks brighter but pretty much the same. A fact we point out. Henry points to the dust he's removed.
He's underestimated Dad. Dad doesn't budge. Not even when its proven that we live in dust mountains. I guess we admired his persistence if nothing else. Henry finally left with his annoying driver buddy four hours later. We almost died when he said he wanted to wait for the wife to return to pitch her the same deal.